Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food.
--Michael Levine
Dining Out
One evening, I went with my parents to a fancy restaurant. Dad was about halfway through his meal when he took a hard look at the potato, called the waitress over and said, "This potato is bad!"

To my utter amazement, the waitress at this "5-Star" place, picked the potato up, smacked it, put it back on the plate, then told my Dad, "If that potato causes any more trouble, just let me know."
Potatoes will take food stains off your fingers. Just slice and rub raw
potato on the stains and rinse with water.
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