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Camping Tips
-Shine a flashlight into one ear. If the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone.
-A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup.
-A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck.
-You can start a fire without matches by eating Mexican food, then breathing on a pile of dry sticks.
-In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear.
-The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling.
-The sight of a bald eagle has thrilled campers for generations. The sight of a bald man, however, does absolutely nothing for the eagle.
-It's entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding mountain road behind a large motor home.
-Effective January 1, 2005, you will actually have to enlist in the Swiss Army to get a Swiss Army Knife.
-In an emergency, a drawstring from a parka hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent-mate.
People who take a vacation to get a tan usually go pale when they get the bill. ~Unknown
La Pax, Bolivia is a virtually fireproof city. At an altitude of about 12,000 feet above sea level, the amount of oxygen in the atmosphere is barely able to support fire.
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