The Red Mini
The convent had been presented with a new car, a red Mini Metro, the pride of its breed.  Sister Lucy, the only qualified driver, became the chauffer for all and sundry.  Every Saturday she would drive Reverend Mother into town for the shopping.

All went well until Bank Holiday weekend when the town was so packed with people and cars that is became evident that there was no earthly place to park.

"Don't worry, Reverend Mother," said Sister Lucy.  "You go into the supermarket and I'll drive around the block until you come out."

Off sped the car, and the Reverend Mother bustled around the store shopping quickly, then rushing back to the curbside.  There she stood for five minutes, ten, twenty.  No sign of Sister Lucy.  Where could she be?

Eventually the Reverend Mother approached a patrolling policeman.

"Excuse me, Officer," said she, Have you seen a nun in a red mini?"

"No," replied the officer, "but these days nothing would surprise me!"
Another way to solve the traffic problems of this country is to pass a law that only paid-for cars be allowed to use the highways.  ~Will Rogers
Until 1896, drivers in Great Britain had to warn of their presence by having a person precede their car on foot, waving a red flag.
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